BAM!

I read this story today about a 70 year-old woman in Ohio using a sauce pan to fight off a group of teens trying to rob her in her own home.

Dear god! I can only hope to have that much testicular fortitude tomorrow, let alone in 40 years. And the fact that Emeril sent her a new set of his pans, since hers was taken as evidence, that totally "kicks it up a notch". Now I have to wonder though, when she hit the would-be robber with the pan, do you think she yelled "BAM!"?

I think I dropped my Chakra back there...

So, for those of you who may have followed my blog for awhile may have come across my occasional yoga infatuation. I'll be upfront and honest, I love yoga. I hate going to the class, but once I'm there and afterwards, I love it. The hating going is all in my head, and it boils down to one simple thing...I'm lazy and often times, extremely unmotivated. I need to change this, in fact, it's one of my New Year's resolutions. Not doing so well on that in so many aspects of my life, but it's good to have a goal. Probably even better to have a plan to accomplish that goal. And still even better yet to put that plan to accomplish that goal into action.

Last night, friend of mine, Princess of Cambodia (called Princess from here on out) got me off my lazy, unmotivated and ever expanding ass and got me to go to yoga with him. (Yes, Princess is a 'he'...it's a long story, but a damn good one probably)

The place I go to yoga (when I go) has several classes throughout the week with several different instructors (I'll refer to them by the day they teach). Each of these instructors has such a different teaching style that you get a very rounded approach I think. Aside from New Monday (as opposed to Old Monday), I really like all of them and their different styles. I think Thursday is probably my favorite. I just really like her style and how she teaches. And she is very approachable and easy to go up to and talk to after class.

Anyhow, Princess and I went to Wednesday's class last night. I like Wednesday's style simply because it seems to be a very different method then the other instructors. Wednesday's classes seem like a 50-50 mix of yoga and ab exercises (which I need more of). Not to be gross or anything, but I was sweating like a whore in church! Who ever would think you don't sweat from yoga, just holding poses and such doesn't know their ass from a hole in the ground. I'm normally not a huge sweater, but yoga gets me dripping like a .... a .... well, like something that drips a large quantity of drips.

I do have to say I only marginally embarrassed myself last night. But I also noticed that I was definitely not the only one falling out of the half-moon pose. Not that I am or should be comparing myself to anyone else and their performance. It is definitely something to do for myself (or yourself). And hell, I feel so much better after I go. I'm working on that motivation/laziness problem. Hopefully I'll have more yoga stories here in the coming weeks.

Monday Mournings

I don't know if it's necessarily a Monday thing, or just me in general as of late...but my blogging and/or creativeness seems to be completely blocked. Don't know if it's related to these mind-numbing headaches I have or not...I think I have a tumor said in my best Arnold the Govenator impersonation..bonus points if you know the reference!

I think this line is mostly filler....

So yeah, sorry about missing yesterday's "Monday Mournings"...I have had a bitch of a cold, and so if I had blogged, you'd all think I had PMS bulked up on steroids (yes, a bigger bitch-fest than usual for me). Still feeling a bit not so hot today, so here is a little something to pass the time.

I got an email with a link to this site that tells you more about you based on your birthday. So I thought I'd post my results and maybe if y'all are interested enough to read, it'd give ya a little insight into the insanity that is Flamingo. Those of you who really know me can judge for yourselves if it fits or not...

I'm not going to actually post my birthday, not sure it's the best idea in the world. However, there are things in there that if you really wanted to know, I'm sure you could figure it out from...so here goes:

Your date of conception was on or about 5 February 1976 which was a Thursday.
I probably really, really did not want to know the date of my conception, because that would involve admitting my parents at some point must have...you know...done things that no child should ever have to consider that their parent did...

You were born on a Thursday
You were born under the astrological sign Scorpio.
Your Life path number is 7.

Your fortune cookie reads:
If you want the rainbow, you must put up with the rain. D. Parton

Life Path Compatibility:
You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 5 & 7.
You should get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 4 & 22.
You may or may not get along well with those with the Life Path number 9.
You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 3, 6, 8 & 11.

The Julian calendar date of your birth is 2443079.5.
The golden number for 1976 is 1.
The epact number for 1976 is -1.
The year 1976 was a leap year.

Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 1/31/1976 and ending 2/17/1977.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Dragon.

Your Native American Zodiac sign is Snake; your plant is Thistle.

You were born in the Egyptian month of Tyby, the first month of the season of Poret (Emergence - Fertile soil).

Your date of birth on the Hebrew calendar is 4 Heshvan 5737.
Or if you were born after sundown then the date is 5 Heshvan 5737.
The Mayan Calendar long count date of your birthday is 12.18.3.5.15 which is
12 baktun 18 katun 3 tun 5 uinal 15 kin
The Hijra (Islamic Calendar) date of your birth is Thursday, 5 Dhi'l-Qa'dih 1396 (1396-11-5).
The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 18 April 1976.
The date of Orthodox Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 25 April 1976.
The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 3 March 1976.
The date of Whitsun (Pentecost Sunday) in the year of your birth was Sunday 6 June 1976.
The date of Whisuntide in the year of your birth was Sunday 13 June 1976.
The date of Rosh Hashanah in the year of your birth was Saturday, 25 September 1976.
The date of Passover in the year of your birth was Thursday, 15 April 1976.
The date of Mardi Gras on your birth year was Tuesday 2 March 1976.

You are 32 years old.
You are 388 months old.
You are 1,686 weeks old.
You are 11,800 days old.
You are 283,213 hours old.
You are 16,992,833 minutes old.
You are 1,019,570,027 seconds old.

Top songs of 1976
Tonight's the Night by Rod Stewart
Silly Love Songs by Wings
Don't Go Breaking My Heart by Elton John & Kiki Dee
Disco Lady by Johnnie Taylor
Play The Funky Music by Wild Cherry
December, 1963 (Oh What a Night) by Four Seasons
50 Ways to Leave Your Lover by Paul Simon
Kiss and Say Goodbye by Manhattans
If You Leave Me Now by Chicago
Love Hangover by Diana Ross


Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 4.61839530332681 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)

Your lucky day is Tuesday.
Your lucky number is 9 & 11.
Your ruling planet(s) is Mars & Pluto.
Your lucky dates are 1st, 10th, 19th, 28th.
Your opposition sign is Taurus.
Your opposition number(s) is 6.
Today is not one of your lucky days!
There are 2XX days till your next birthday
on which your cake will have 33 candles.

Those 33 candles produce 33 BTUs,
or 8,316 calories of heat (that's only 8.3160 food Calories!) .
You can boil 3.77 US ounces of water with that many candles.
In 1976 there were approximately 3.1 million births in the US.
In 1976 the US population was approximately 203,302,031 people, 57.4 persons per square mile.
In 1976 in the US there were approximately 2,152,662 marriages (10.1%) and 1,036,000 divorces (4.9%)
In 1976 in the US there were approximately 1,921,000 deaths (9.5 per 1000)
In the US a new person is born approximately every 8 seconds.
In the US one person dies approximately every 12 seconds.

In 1976 the population of Australia was approximately 14,110,107.
In 1976 there were approximately 227,810 births in Australia.
In 1976 in Australia there were approximately 109,973 marriages and 63,230 divorces.
In 1976 in Australia there were approximately 112,662 deaths.


Your birthstone is Tourmaline

The Mystical properties of Tourmaline
Pink Tourmaline promotes female balance and protection. Green Toumaline promotes male balance.
Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)
Opal, Jasper

Your birth tree is
Walnut Tree, the Passion
Unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egoistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromises.

There are 311 days till Christmas 2009!
There are 324 days till Orthodox Christmas!

The moon's phase on the day you were
born was waxing crescent.

Monday Mournings

Yes, it's that time of the week again (not to be confused with "that time of the month"...which I have been known to suffer ubber-bitchiness during).

Today, all I'm going to say is snow. And honestly, that should be enough of a complaint. Snow is of the devil. And yes, I KNOW, I always bitch about snow. But it keeps coming back...again and again. It belongs only in the mountains where nutjob skiers, snowboarders and others of the like can enjoy it without inconveniencing me.

Oh, yeah, not enjoying winter, never have since I got out of the 'fun to play in the snow' phase like a billion years ago. And Roommate, yes you, you have so dropped the ball. I give you one little bitty assignment to make it stop snowing, and have you? HAVE YOU??? No! You have utterly failed me in this.

Monday Mournings

So...I decided to rethink the name of my Monday rants. I may play with it for a few weeks before I settle on something I really like...but here is goes for today.

My gripe of this week is blinkers. Blinkers...people, use them! There is nothing quite so entertaining as swerving across multiple lanes of traffic to avoid that douche-nozzle who decided to switch lanes or in some other form, change directs right into my lane with no warning whatsoever! Today's champion was some idiotic $@*! (un-mentionable word for female idiots) in a big ol' white SUV. Probably some mo-mo soccer mom with 37 kids on the car and too busy yelling at little Johnny and Suzie for kicking the shit out of each other to pay attention to the road.

You could at least use your blinker when you cut someone off. That way you can kinda, sorta blame it on them...they should have been watching where I was going. But, until I (and others out there, I'm sure) get my internet certificate for psychic ability, I'm going to be relying on you dumbasses out there to give my some indication of where you are going, hopefully by you using your blinker. And for a certain someone out there (you know who you are) always, always, always use your frakin' blinker. I'm no legal expert, but I'm pretty sure the blinker law doesn't read "Use your blinker unless no one else is around or you just plain don't feel like it!"

So there!